Wednesday, May 15, 2013

It's Me. Not You.

I'm struggling with something here. So, the purpose of this post is to maybe help someone else who may be going through something similar. I am not trying to be negative. I am not ripping anyone apart.

I am preaching at myself.

Have you ever done something in your past where you've messed up really badly and then tried to ask forgiveness for it later?

I have. I seem to be the queen of mess ups. Big. Small. Medium. It doesn't matter. I screw up. Often.

There once was a time where I opened my mouth and said some things that, while true, were not laced with Christian love and longsuffering. I didn't take the time to pray over the hostile situation before I went ahead with both barrels and fired away. And while I was correct in principle, I was incorrect in my delivery.

I should have waited on the Lord to deal with the situation.
I should have prayed harder. Better. More.
I should have asked for a forgiving heart when others wronged me in hurtful ways.
I should have asked God to help me see people the way He sees them.

Life is full of should have's. But there's a problem with those.
When you focus on the should have that didn't happen in a volatile circumstance, you're focusing on the wrong thing.
Why?
Because that's in the past. It cannot be fixed. You can not, in no way, shape, form, or fashion go back and change it. The bad news? It's done and cannot be recalled.
You don't live there anymore.
You want to hear the good news?
You don't live there anymore!

I am in this situation right now. I know about the rejection you feel after you've bent over backward trying to fix something and the other party won't forgive you.
And I have learned something from it.

unforgiveness hurts http://www.sxc.hu/photo/1080946


1. Prayer. First and foremost, when the other party won't forgive and forget, prayer is the only balm that will soothe your hurt. Because God cares and He knows what it feels to be rejected.
2. Read the Bible. What does God say about forgiving when someone else won't?
3. Apply what you've read. Daily. Every minute, if need be! Memorize what you've read and when you feel that ugly monster rearing its head, fight back by repeating what you've memorized. In the first few days, this may feel like a continuous thing, but eventually, if you stick to it, Satan will leave you alone and attack an easier target. Don't be that target.
4. Was #3 difficult? Don't give up! Get up, dust yourself off, and try again.

Here are some Scriptures that will help.
Matthew 6:14-15 - For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you: But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.

Mark 11:25 - And when ye stand praying, forgive, if ye have aught against any: that your Father also which is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses.

Hebrews 10:30 - For we know him that hath said, vengeance belongeth unto me, I will recompense, saith the Lord. And again, The Lord shall judge his people.

Matthew 5:44 - But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you

Romans 12:21 - Be not overcome of evil, but overcome evil with good.
I hope this has helped you in some way. I hope this is a blessing to you as you continue on your journey with Him.


Amanda Stephan~Christian Author
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